What the Bible Says About Trauma and Panic Attacks: A Conversation with Dave

Episode Summary

What happens when a theology professor's own panic attacks and trauma make his lifelong understanding of faith fall apart? In this episode of the God and Mental Health Podcast, Roslyn talks with Dave, a professor of New Testament studies and Christian theology, about the anxiety, panic attacks, and trauma that reshaped his faith, and how tracing the Bible's recurring theme of water and chaos gave him language for suffering he didn't have before. Their conversation covers trauma, embodiment, shame, and community, and previews Dave's upcoming book, In the Sea Was No More: Reading the Bible in the Deep.

Scripture Referenced

• Psalm 69 — Dave describes opening his Bible to this psalm during a retreat and reading its opening lines, "Save me, O Lord, for the water has come up to my neck. I sink in deep mire where there is no foothold." He does not cite a specific verse number, but identifies it as the beginning of Psalm 69.
• Genesis 1 — Dave references the creation account, where the Spirit of God hovers over the dark, watery chaos called "the deep" before God brings order and life into being. He references the chapter generally without citing a specific verse.
• Revelation — Dave references the vision of a new heaven and a new earth where "the sea was no more," and where death, mourning, crying, and pain will be no more because the first things have passed away. He references the book generally without citing a specific chapter or verse.
• Roslyn also references the Genesis account of Adam and Eve hiding from God after their sin, including God's question "who told you that you were naked," without citing a specific chapter or verse.

Links & Resources Mentioned

• Book: In the Sea Was No More: Reading the Bible in the Deep by Dave — releasing (shipping) September 22nd, described as part memoir and part Bible study
• General reference to EMDR therapy (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), which Dave went through for roughly three years as part of his trauma treatment
• General reference to Alcoholics Anonymous, used as an example of a small, honest community where people can be fully known in a way Dave says "big church" often fails to provide

Key Topics & Takeaways

A "high-functioning nervous wreck." Dave describes living with anxiety since childhood while still functioning well in daily life, including through a PhD in theology and a career as a professor. He explains that this changed significantly after the birth of his first child 22 years ago, when his anxiety began to escalate.

When panic attacks began. Dave traces his first major panic attack to December 26, 2004 — Boxing Day — while watching footage of the Indian Ocean tsunami. As his son grew older, approaching the age Dave was during a significant childhood trauma, Dave began experiencing panic attacks, intrusive images, and intrusive thoughts, describing himself as coming close to, but never fully entering, psychosis.

Getting help. Dave's wife, who is also a therapist, connected him with a trauma therapist. Through roughly three years of EMDR therapy, Dave says he came to understand how much unprocessed trauma his body was carrying separately from his conscious mind, and began learning to recognize his triggers.

Faith as a "bag of tricks" that stopped working. Dave explains that his usual coping tools — prayer, Bible reading, and spiritual disciplines — became inaccessible once his anxiety intensified, forcing him to confront how cognitive and disembodied his faith had been up to that point. He describes having to discover what he calls an "embodied Christianity," recognizing that he wasn't just a mind carrying a body around, but that he was a body.

Rediscovering scripture through Psalm 69. While attending a retreat and speaking publicly again after years away, Dave opened his Bible to Psalm 69 and found its opening imagery of drowning in deep water spoke directly to his experience for the first time. This led him to trace water and chaos imagery throughout scripture, from Genesis through Revelation, and became the foundation for his book.

The theme of "the deep." Dave unpacks the biblical concept of "the deep" — the watery chaos present at creation in Genesis, which God doesn't destroy but instead gives structure and purpose within. He connects this to the flood narrative, where the waters of chaos "undo" creation, and explains that throughout scripture, water and waves become a recurring metaphor for catastrophic, uncontrollable overwhelm — illness, sin, invading armies, and grief.

Death as the ultimate uncontrollable force. Dave explains that in scripture, believers are told they can resist Satan but not death, which he calls "the last enemy" — a force with total dominion over creation that only God has power over, paralleling the sea in biblical imagery. He connects this to the closing vision in Revelation, where the sea, along with death, mourning, and pain, is finally removed.

Rethinking suffering and God's sovereignty. Dave shares that his crisis of faith wasn't about doubting God's existence or goodness, but about reconciling belief in God's sovereignty with a world that could "blow up on a heartbeat" without clear reason. He describes coming to see chaos and unpredictability as part of God's good creation rather than evidence of God's absence.

Community over isolation. Dave emphasizes that humans aren't made to face suffering alone, describing how his wife, his therapist, and eventually others he opened up to all played a role in his healing by consistently showing up and saying "I'm with you." He talks about the need to be able to be, in his words, "naked and unashamed" before other people, not just before God.

How this changed his teaching. Dave now speaks openly about his own mental health struggles in every class he teaches, noting that most of his students are navigating similar issues. He also teaches scripture through the lens of what it means to struggle as a human being, and reframes the power described in Paul's writing on the resurrection as something that enables deeper vulnerability and openness rather than an escape from weakness.

A critique of "big church" culture. Dave and Roslyn discuss how mainstream American Christianity often emphasizes victory and control rather than making space for vulnerability and shame, using Alcoholics Anonymous as an example of the kind of small, honest community that church often fails to provide. Roslyn connects this to the biblical account of Adam and Eve hiding and covering themselves after sinning, framing shame as something rooted in disconnection rather than exposure.

About the book. Dave's book, In the Sea Was No More: Reading the Bible in the Deep, ships September 22nd and interweaves his personal story with a chapter-by-chapter walk through scripture's water and chaos imagery. He describes it as "a memoir in scripture," noting that he spent about a year and a half considering publishing it anonymously due to shame before ultimately deciding to publish it under his own name.

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