The Curse From Ignoring Fatherhood

Has the world fallen under a curse? If so what is it? If you've ever wondered why it seems the world is spinning out of control with things like violence, anger needless suffering and mental health issues, the root cause of most of it is the same and so is the solution.

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Transcription - The Curse From Ignoring Fatherhood

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Welcome to the Fatherhood Challenge, a movement to awaken and inspire fathers everywhere to take great pride in their role and a

Challenge society to understand how important fathers are to the stability and culture of their families environment.

Now here's your host, Jonathan Guerrero.

Greetings everyone. Thank you so much for joining me. It's always good to have you with me.

I always appreciate each person that listens. There's many things you could be listening to, many things that you could direct your attention to.

But you have chosen to listen to this program and you've chosen to listen to this episode.

And I just want to tell you right now that I appreciate you. I appreciate each and every one of you.

Thank you so much. This program is going to be a little bit different.

You've probably already noticed a little bit of a change in the format. We have a lot to cover.

And it goes pretty deep, so we're not going to waste any time. We're really just going to dive in.

So I want to talk about the Fatherhood Challenge, what the Fatherhood Challenge is doing, why it exists, and what it has to do with you.

The Fatherhood Challenge was, was a direct call in my life by God.

This wasn't something I had any desire to do, nor did it, did I have any interest in doing something like this.

But it was a calling that I felt. I've talked about this story on other episodes of how the Fatherhood Challenge started.

I made a deal with God. And the deal was that since I didn't want to do this and I didn't know anything about how to do something like this,

the deal was that God would take ownership for the program.

I was willing to be the grunt. I was willing to be the face of the Fatherhood Challenge, the voice of the Fatherhood Challenge.

But this would have to be his program. This would have to be his agenda, and he would have to take charge and run it.

He would be responsible for opening doors and closing doors that I or the program were not meant to go through.

And I can tell you to this day that he has kept that promise.

When I think about why the Fatherhood Challenge exists, it's a very sobering reminder of where God's priorities are, and where our should be.

So we're going to take a look at those priorities. Where exactly are our priorities individually?

Where are our priorities as a culture?

The heart of God is very, very, very close to the Fatherhood topic in the Fatherhood agenda.

And there's a very, very unique reason why, and we're going to explore that in depth.

And why Fatherhood should be close to you?

So if you've paid any attention to the Fatherhood Challenge, if you've looked at the website, if you've looked at the logo, one of the things you're going to see as part of the logo is the mission statement and purpose.

The mission statement and purpose comes from Malachi 4-6. His preaching will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers.

Otherwise, I will come and strike a land with the curse.

We don't like to talk about the curse part. The first part of that text really makes us feel warm and fuzzy.

But the second part is just as important to talk about as the first.

Originally, when we think of this scripture text, we think of thousands of years ago in the time of Elijah, and this has been part of the Elijah message.

But we think of it as a story that was meant, that was written thousands of years ago, and it was,

and that it was meant for that time. And yes, it was meant for that time as well.

However, that scripture text is part of a prophetic message, and that prophetic message is equally valid for our time.

It is relevant to the day and time that we are living in today.

If you want proof of that, all you have to do is look at some of the bad things that have happened in our country, specifically things like mass shootings.

You don't even have to look at that. You can just turn on the news and watch the news every night.

But if we want to go even deeper, yes, go look at things like mass shootings.

So every time a mass shooting happens, what is one of the first two things that gets talked about?

One is gun control, and two is school security, or if it's happening in malls or in airport or some other public place,

how to secure that environment. What you won't hear talked about is the home life of the shooter.

Where was the father in that shooter's life? You will never hear that talked about on the news.

You will never hear that explored. And why is that? It's very simple.

It's a lot less painful to talk about things like gun control and security than it is to talk about what's going on in our homes.

But it's time that we do because that is the curse that got us specifically talking about.

But it is an escalation of violence. It is it is it is being out of control. It is a culture that is out of control.

It is individuals who are out of control. And the root of most of that is lack of a father,

a father who is either emotionally absent or physically absent or often both. This is the root cause of it.

And this is what we will do anything we can to avoid talking about.

There are many countries that are taking the fatherhood initiative seriously. But if you turn on the news,

this is not something that you will hear discussed on the news. You'll still hear you might hear some good stories now and then.

But it's generally bad news that you hear when you turn on your local news. We aren't talking about fatherhood.

The whole of the place is I would expect to hear some sort of a sermon or some sort of talk about fatherhood and the importance of fatherhood and what it means to God.

I would expect in a house of worship to hear that discussion or to hear a sermon like that happening.

But I would challenge you to reflect back on when the last time was that you heard a sermon about fatherhood and about the image of God.

So if we can't even talk about fatherhood and a house of worship, how do you expect to hear the topic of fatherhood being discussed on a national level in any country.

Let's talk about what happens when we ignore these warnings when we don't take it seriously.

Fatherless has been found to have significant impact on crime rates. And here's some statistics and research findings on the topic.

According to the US Department of Justice children from fatherless homes are more likely to be involved in criminal behavior.

They are at a higher risk of committing a variety of crimes including drug abuse, violence and juvenile delinquency.

A study published in the Journal of Research and Crime and Delinquency found that fatherless children are more likely to engage in criminal behavior compared to children who live with both parents.

Research from the National Fatherhood Initiative also shows that children who grow up without a father are more likely to experience poverty, drop out of school and have behavior problems, all of which are risk factors in criminal behavior.

You think this might be a reason to take fatherhood seriously? We have prisons, both local prisons, we have state prisons and we have federal prisons that are overcrowded.

Now let's talk about something else of the fatherhood initiatives that are out there that do exist fatherhood programs.

There are very few programs out there that are actually involving God that actually talk about God and involve God as the solution.

Being the fact and truth that we are made in God's image does it seem does it make any kind of logical sense to leave God out of the process of bringing fathers and children together?

Does it make any kind of logical sense to leave God out of the process of a father trying to improve himself?

Does it make any sense when we are made in God's image?

So in our arrogance, have we actually accomplished anything? Have we actually made any improvements without God?

Let's explore what religion actually contributes to the fatherlessness discussion.

There are some studies and reports that have explored the role of religion, including Christianity in addressing issues related to fatherlessness.

And here are some of the key points and findings.

Many faith-based organizations, including Christian churches, play a significant role in providing support and resources to families affected by fatherlessness.

These organizations often offer monitoring programs, mentoring programs, counseling services and community support to help address the challenges faced by children growing up without fathers.

Research has also shown that religious involvement, including participation in Christian activities such as attending church services

and engaging in religious practices was associated with a greater family stability. This can include stronger parent-child-relationships, reduced likelihood of divorce and improved overall family well-being.

The Christian faith emphasizes the importance of fatherhood and provides guidance on the roles and responsibilities of fathers within families.

Many Christian teachings stress the importance of fathers being present, supportive and actively involved in their children's lives.

So let's examine this a little bit further. But if you actually go and look into, for example, if you look at a lot of radio networks, a lot of radio programs, you'll be hard pressed to find programs specifically dealing with fatherhood.

They are out there, but they are few and far between. I am very, very proud to be part of a network that actually cares about fatherhood.

And yes, I am one of the programs on a network that does actually care about fatherhood.

Let's talk about religion. Let's talk about what God has to say about religion.

And this scripture text comes from Isaiah 1. This is God talking.

What makes you think I want all your sacrifices, says the Lord? I'm sick of your burnt offerings of rams and the fat of fat and cattle.

I get no pleasure from the blood of bulls and lambs and goats. And when you come to worship me, who asked you to parade through my courts with all your ceremony?

Stop bringing me your meaningless gifts, the incense of your offerings disgusts me.

As for your celebrations of the new moon in the Sabbath and your special days for fasting, they are all sinful and false.

I want no more of your pious meetings. I hate your new moon celebrations and your annual festivals. They are a burden to me. I cannot stand them.

When you lift up your hands in prayer, I will not look. Though you offer many prayers, I will not listen for your hands are covered with the blood of innocent victims.

Wash yourselves and be clean. Get your sins out of my sight. Give up your evil ways. Learn to do good.

Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows.

Come now. Let's settle this, says the Lord. Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them white as snow.

Though they are red as crimson, I will make them white as wool.

If you will obey me, you will have plenty to eat. But if you turn away and refuse to listen, you will be devoured by the sword of your enemies.

I, the Lord, have spoken. So yes, that's a fascinating one from Isaiah. Do we have a lot of wars today?

Yeah, are we talking about fatherhood? No. Could this be part of the curse that God talked about that God tried to warn us about thousands of years ago?

Yeah, absolutely. I believe that 100%. Orphans are a parentless. They are without a parent.

And there's lots of ways for that to take place. A parent can be physically absent.

An apparent can also be emotionally absent and sometimes both. And this includes fathers.

So yes, the fatherhood agenda, the fatherhood topic is front and center to God's heart.

And as long as we are choosing to ignore this issue, as long as we are choosing not to talk about it,

and as long as we are deliberately choosing to leave God out of the discussion, the curse is promised.

And it is actively happening. God is not interested in your piety.

God is not interested in your religious rituals and your services. He's not interested in your plain church.

He's interested in how you treat those around you.

If you've done the homework, if you've done a Bible study on it, then you already know very, very well

that an expectation before you come and take part in the Lord's supper.

The expectation is that you first go make things right. The starts in your home.

The starts with your wife, the starts with your children. You first make things right in your home.

Then you go make things right. With your brothers and sisters in the church,

with people outside the church that you've wronged, you go make those wrongs right.

You apologize where you need to make apologies. You make things right. Then you come before the Lord

and participate in the Lord's supper. That is a very, very, very clear expectation.

Now, let's talk about children. Children in this day and age are treated like an inconvenience.

They are treated like a burden. If you want proof of that, all we have to do is talk about abortion.

We're not going to spend, we could easily spend an hour episode alone just talking about abortion,

but we're not going to do that. But the point is made, if you spend any time thinking about or

researching the abortion issue, it's not hard to find the root issue in that is that children

are an inconvenience. That is the central theme in abortion. Something a funny thing about children

is that when you have them, suddenly it's not all about you anymore. You now have to care for someone

else. You have to think about someone else besides yourself. It's very, very normal to have fears,

certain fears. Am I ready? Am I going to be able to actually care for this child? Not feeling prepared.

And you can have these feelings when you expect the child. But it's another thing when you actually

don't want the child because it's going to up into your life because it's going to ruin your life

because all you want to do is think about yourself. When thinking about yourself is the root motive

for why you want to have an abortion, that's a problem. And it is not the unborn child's problem.

It is not the unborn baby's problem. It is an internal problem. That's reason enough

to prove that children are often seen as an inconvenience in our culture. If you go into certain

churches, children are treated with the philosophy that they're to be seen but not heard. There are

many churches where if a child starts getting loud, a deacon will escort the mother or someone will

escort the mother out of the church or shame the mother or shame both the mother and the child.

Jesus, however, had a very different take on children. Children flocked to him. He made time for them.

He made them feel like they were special, like they were wanted. If we treated children that way,

if we treated our own children that way, if children were seen as a blessing,

instead of a curse or an inconvenience, well, I don't think we really would have to be talking

about the fatherhood issue as urgently as we need to now. So what is scripture have to say about

children? If we look at Psalm 1273, that text says children are a gift from the Lord.

They are reward from him. Well, that's a different way of looking at children.

Children being a reward from God. Children being a gift from God. What if our culture thought of children

that way? Because the funny thing is when we neglect the fatherhood issue, when we ignore

fatherhood and when we ignore God's role in fatherhood, what we're really saying is that we don't

like children. What we're really saying is that children are not important to us. It's the same thing.

You can't separate the father from children. Children need their father. I have seen time and time

and time again. The damage that happens to children when they are missing their father.

When a father is either alienated out of a child's life or a father chooses to alienate

himself from his children's life. And sometimes it happens other ways, other unfortunate ways that

can't be, there's nothing you can do anything about such as death. Fatherlessness can happen that way.

But the earlier the absence happens in the child's life, the deeper the damage, I've experienced it

in my own life. This is how I know. And I've seen it in other people's lives. And this is why

when we ignore this issue, what we are also saying is that we don't care about fatherless children.

They are not a priority in our culture. We don't care about them. If we don't care enough to talk

about fatherlessness, and if we don't care enough to talk about God's role in solving it, then we really

don't care about children. Now let's move on and let's talk about the image of God. What is the

image of God have to do with any of this? If you ever look at the Lord's prayer in scripture,

and this is how Jesus taught us to pray and taught us disciples to pray. The very first thing is our

father. We address God the father as that as our father. So is it a stretch for us to understand

that we are made in the image of God? This is in scripture. It's in the book of Genesis, the creation

story. We are made in the image of God. I don't know what part of that our culture refuses to accept

refuses to understand and deliberately ignores. It's a tall order for a father to try to understand

that his relationship with his children is a reflection of his relationship with his heavenly

father. And that's the way it was designed to be. It's a tall order. You weren't meant to deal with

this alone. So why do we choose to? What exactly are we scared of? So as we wrap this up, I want to

talk, I want to challenge you to look at yourself, to look at yourself. Where are you in this whole

discussion of fatherhood? Are you a missing father in your own life and you're struggling with how

to be apparent to your own children? Are you struggling to push past your own pain to become

available for your own children? Are you one of the people that are not really interested in

the fatherhood agenda and talking about it and you'd rather just ignore it and pretend it's not an

issue? If that is you, why do you feel that way? What's the root reason why? Are you one of those people

who refuse to involve God in the fatherhood discussion? Because you're angry with God over your own

issues or your own pain that you're going through. If you fall into any of those categories,

I'm not going to sugarcoat the solution. The solution may or may not be what you think or what you

want it to be, but the center of the solution and the solution itself is God. It is God.

God has always been open to us. If you're mad at God over a painful past or and I've been there,

I know what that's like. If you're angry, if you're mad at God because you were abandoned as a child,

the solution is to talk to him. He's not afraid of your anger, believe me, but he wants to hear from you.

He wants to reveal the truth to you. He wants to heal you. He's not willing to abandon you.

He's not willing to leave you sitting there in your anguish.

But if you don't talk to him, he's not going to force himself on you either. That's not the kind of

God he is. So I want to challenge you to reach out to God if you're struggling as a parent

with anything, whether it's raising a teen, whether it's lack of sleep and trying to have patience

to take care of your family and not even sure how to do that well, talk to God about it. Bring everything

to him. He wants to hear from you. Everything. He wants to hear everything from you. Every little detail

he wants to know about and he wants to be involved. So don't shut him out. Don't leave him out.

Your anger brings that to him as well. He wants to hear that. Don't hold anything back.

And the other thing is trust. And that comes with time and that comes with trying him.

Give him a chance. Open up to him and then watch what he does.

So as we close and wrap up this episode, I want to pray a prayer for you. And so I want to ask that

you open up your heart and take this prayer and is your own. Heavenly Father,

thank you so much for each person listening now. I want to ask that you will personally send

your Holy Spirit into their life, into their heart. And I want to ask that you will

that you will come close and that you will read their what's on their mind and what's on their heart.

It could be pain from a traumatic past. It could be an abandonment from a missing Father in their life

that could be from a death that could be from a dad who's walked out. Whatever it is, Father,

I want to ask that your presence will be there with that dad, with that person that you will be

especially close to them that you will bring healing. The Holy Spirit is known as the great healer.

And so I want to ask for healing for that person that you will heal their heart.

For the dad that is feeling stressed to the breaking point, feeling overwhelmed, unsure of what to do in

raising raising his children. You are also the source of knowledge and you are also the source of

wisdom. And so I want to ask that you will give that dad wisdom and knowledge to know what to do.

It may be help. Maybe that dad needs an extra hand and needs help.

Whatever resources that dad needs to take some of that burn in a way to let him know that he's not alone.

I want to ask that you will provide that for that dad that he can parent that child that he can

love that child with all of his heart and give that child what he needs. And at the same time

that his own heart would be filled. So that is my prayer, Father.

For Father's listening today, help them to understand and realize they are not alone that you

love them beyond what they can comprehend. That you care about them, that you see them,

that they are not alone. Thank you so much, Father. In Jesus name. Amen.

Thank you for listening to this episode of the Fatherhood Challenge. If you would like to contact us,

listen to other episodes, find any resource mentioned in this program or find out more information

about the Fatherhood Challenge. Please visit thefatherhoodchallenge.com. That's thefatherhoodchallenge.com.

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