I&#39;m Dr. Margaret, a psychologist for over 30 years, TEDx speaker, and the author of Perfectly Hidden Depression. I created The SelfWork Podcast in 2016 to explain mental health treatment and to give you the chance to consider therapy without thinking it&#39;s weird or that it somehow suggests you can&#39;t fix your own problems. My team is very honored that nine years later, SelfWork has earned nearly 5 million downloads! Each episode features the popular listener question as well as interviews with outstanding guests, authors, and experts, adding to the wide diversity of topics listeners so appreciate. Regularly rated as one of the top mental health/depression podcasts out there (ranked as a top .5% internationally) I keep it short, casual, and focused on &#34;what you can do about it.&#34; I&#39;d love to hear from you. Please join me.

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There’s a word for intense fear of change. Metathesiophobia.That’s when your fear of change is so strong and affects your life so intensely that you’ve developed an actual phobia around change. If that has become the case, then you’d avoid any change in your life as much as possible and stay in a constant state of agitation or vigilance about potential change.But change is inevitable. Time brings change. People change. Children change. Circumstances change. Cultures change. Even beliefs can change.Yet you could live a life denying change. You could keep treating your kids like kids, instead of seeing them grow into their own beings. You could fight your body changing and aging with all sorts of anti-aging products. You could see cultural change and fear it so much that you become paranoid about its impact and fight against it, surrounding yourself with people who share your beliefs. And share your fear.In this episode of SelfWork, we’ll tackle this very important distinction: how you’re fearing something because of the limited information you have about it, not realizing how your own assumptions about it are keeping you afraid.<h2>Important Links:</h2>Click <a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FKSHQY9T?channelId=500&lv=shuf&plpRedirect=mhFallback" rel="nofollow">here</a> to order the PHD Workbook!Click here to find out more about <a href="https://www.pesi.com/productgroupcampaigns/bh_global_partner_affiliate_151033-9256/?_ef_transaction_id=0e34c9b9f80c4814a14cbfb539ce0089&utm_campaign=LWC151033&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_source=Dr.+Margaret+Rutherford" rel="nofollow">Dr. Margaret&#39;s PESI course on perfectionism and depression</a> on November 2, 2026! It&#39;s virtual! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

There’s a word for intense fear of change. Metathesiophobia.

That’s when your fear of change is so strong and affects your life so intensely that you’ve developed an actual phobia around change. If that has become the case, then you’d avoid any change in your life as much as possible and stay in a constant state of agitation or vigilance about potential change.

But change is inevitable. Time brings change. People change. Children change. Circumstances change. Cultures change. Even beliefs can change.

In this episode of SelfWork, we’ll tackle this very important distinction: how you’re fearing something because of the limited information you have about it, not realizing how your own assumptions about it are keeping you afraid.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

517 SelfWork: Challenging Your Fear and The Underlying Assumptions That Keep It Alive

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Having a panic disorder is bad enough.You may be able to anticipate it happening; for example, if you tend to panic when you see a spider or a snake.But other times, panic attacks – the sudden onset of intense symptoms of anxiety, such as trouble breathing, your heart racing, feelings of wanting or even needing to flee, tunnel vision, sweating, trembling – these very unwelcome and unexpected feelings come upon you like a freight train suddenly roaring toward you - going its fastest speed. It can truly feel as if you’ve been invaded by some other being and the attacks themselves can be very frightening, especially if you have no idea what they are.<h2>Panicked About Panic...</h2>Yet what can easily begin to happen - after you’ve had a few of these highly unpleasant and even humiliating attacks – you can begin to fear them. You can see ahead and realize that you might have to deal with one at a time when you have responsibilities, duties, things to do.And so… you become panicked about panic.In this episode of SelfWork, we&#39;ll focus on five surefire ways to calm your nervous system and deal with &#34;panic about panic.&#34; <h2>Episode -Specific Links:</h2><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=6s&v=AwBwPs46TJk" rel="nofollow">Dr. Saunders&#39; YouTube video on these five calming techniques</a>!<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/panic-disorder-and-anxiety" rel="nofollow">Goodreads recommendations for &#34;best self-help books for panic disorder&#34;</a><h2>Important Links:</h2>Click <a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0FKSHQY9T?channelId=500&lv=shuf&plpRedirect=mhFallback" rel="nofollow">here</a> to order the PHD Workbook!Click here to find out more about <a href="https://www.pesi.com/productgroupcampaigns/bh_global_partner_affiliate_151033-9256/?_ef_transaction_id=0e34c9b9f80c4814a14cbfb539ce0089&utm_campaign=LWC151033&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_source=Dr.+Margaret+Rutherford" rel="nofollow">Dr. Margaret&#39;s PESI course on perfectionism and depression</a> on November 2, 2026! It&#39;s virtual! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Having a panic disorder is bad enough.

You may be able to anticipate it happening; for example, if you tend to panic when you see a spider or a snake.

But other times, panic attacks – the sudden onset of intense symptoms of anxiety, such as trouble breathing, your heart racing, feelings of wanting or even needing to flee, tunnel vision, sweating, trembling – these very unwelcome and unexpected feelings come upon you like a freight train suddenly roaring toward you - going its fastest speed. It can truly feel as if you’ve been invaded by some other being and the attacks themselves can be very frightening, especially if you have no idea what they are.

Panicked About Panic...
Yet what can easily begin to happen - after you’ve had a few of these highly unpleasant and even humiliating attacks – you can begin to fear them. You can see ahead and realize that you might have to deal with one at a time when you have responsibilities, duties, things to do.

And so… you become panicked about panic.

In this episode of SelfWork, we&#39;ll focus on five surefire ways to calm your nervous system and deal with &#34;panic about panic.&#34;

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

516 SelfWork: Panicked About Panic: 5 Surefire Ways to Calm Your Nervous System

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Today we&#39;ll focus on <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/008-selfwork-learning-the-true-skills-of-listening/" rel="nofollow">how to listen to someone</a> so that they feel truly understood and seen.And it may not be a kind of listening that you know about. It&#39;s a method called &#34;affect labeling&#34; - meaning labeling the emotions of the person you&#39;re listening to. And our expert today is Doug Noll, who teaches this method all over the world.This episode will teach you this new way of listening that is amazingly effective! Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go.<a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Today we&#39;ll focus on how to listen to someone so that they feel truly understood and seen.

And it may not be a kind of listening that you know about. It&#39;s a method called &#34;affect labeling&#34; - meaning labeling the emotions of the person you&#39;re listening to. And our expert today is Doug Noll, who teaches this method all over the world.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

515 SelfWork: Enhance Your Skills: Listening Someone Into Existence with Doug Noll

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Today I&#39;m focusing on three role models in my own life and the questions you can ask to help you identify your own.Who are they? Dolly Parton. Maya Angelou. And a woman named &#34;Snooky.&#34;How does someone become a role model for you?Someone in your life may know that you look up to them, that you want to emulate them in some way.Others role models will never know it. You simply know of them. Or you’ve read their writings. Heard their songs. Watched them from afar.This episode will help you find your own role models and begin to put the values you choose into your life! Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go.<a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Dolly Parton, Maya Angelou, and A Woman Named Snooky.

Today I&#39;m focusing on three role models in my own life and the questions you can ask to help you identify your own. 

Dolly Parton. Maya Angelou. And a woman named &#34;Snooky.&#34;

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514 SelfWork: Three Essential Questions to Identify Your Role Model

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You may never have been on the inside of a psych ward. In his new book, JaKob Williams takes you there.Or at least, he takes you to his version of a residential psych ward.He&#39;s an interesting guy. Brilliant. Sarcastic. Successful. Driven. Creative. Funny.And he has bipolar disorder, which sometimes gets the better of him. He becomes manic, and even psychotic. As he says...&#34;You talk about PHD. Perfectly hidden depression. I&#39;m POM. Perfectly obvious mania.&#34;Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go. <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

You may never have been on the inside of a psych ward. In his new book, JaKob Williams takes you there.

Or at least, he takes you to his version of a residential psych ward.

He&#39;s an interesting guy. Brilliant. Sarcastic. Successful. Driven. Creative. Funny.

And he has bipolar disorder, which sometimes gets the better of him. He becomes manic, and even psychotic. As he says...

&#34;You talk about PHD. Perfectly hidden depression. I&#39;m POM. Perfectly obvious mania.&#34;

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513 SelfWork: Inside A Psych Ward: A New Book by JaKob Williams, Chock Full of Nuts

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Dr. Nick Wignall continues as Dr. Margaret&#39;s guest this week, as we switch from focusing on emotional fitness to the 100% effective CBT tool for curing insomnia, called sleep compression.It&#39;s hard to believe that in ten years of doing SelfWork, I don&#39;t remember an episode where we were focusing on insomnia, although I hear about it on a regular basis all the time. We&#39;ve talked about &#34;sleep disturbance&#34; frequently in the context of classic depression, bipolar disorder, <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/483-selfwork-flashbacks-and-nightmares-healing-fear-and-finding-peace/" rel="nofollow">nightmares,</a> or anxiety. So when Nick told me one of this areas of expertise was insomnia, I jumped at it.<h2>How does sleep compression work?</h2><a href="https://nickwignall.com/sleep-compression/" rel="nofollow">Nick goes on to describe the technique called sleep compression</a> (a term I&#39;d never heard) that is a CBT - or cognitive behavioral therapy tool - that is 100% effective for insomnia. It&#39;s fascinating to hear and makes such common sense. Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Dr. Nick Wignall continues as Dr. Margaret&#39;s guest this week, as we switch from focusing on emotional fitness to the 100% effective CBT tool for curing insomnia, called sleep compression.

It&#39;s hard to believe that in ten years of doing SelfWork, I don&#39;t remember an episode where we were focusing on insomnia, although I hear about it on a regular basis all the time. We&#39;ve talked about &#34;sleep disturbance&#34; frequently in the context of classic depression, bipolar disorder, nightmares, or anxiety. So when Nick told me one of this areas of expertise was insomnia, I jumped at it.

How does sleep compression work?
Nick goes on to describe the technique called sleep compression (a term I&#39;d never heard) that is a CBT - or cognitive behavioral therapy tool - that is 100% effective for insomnia. It&#39;s fascinating to hear and makes such common sense.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

512 SelfWork: CBT for Insomnia and Its 100% Effective Cure: Dr. Nick Wignall

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Dr. Nick Wignall speaks about the vital importance of emotional fitness and becoming the hero of your life. This whole concept is intriguing and suggests that finding and maintaining your own sense of agency - of having some sense of and belief in your ability to have an impact on your life.Understanding emotional fitness is not just about recognizing the feelings we experience but also about actively managing them. Many people find themselves in situations where they feel overwhelmed by their emotions, which can lead to stress and anxiety. By implementing practices that enhance emotional fitness, individuals can learn to navigate these challenges more effectively.Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go. <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Dr. Nick Wignall speaks about the vital importance of emotional fitness and becoming the hero of your life. This whole concept is intriguing and suggests that finding and maintaining your own sense of agency - of having some sense of and belief in your ability to have an impact on your life.

Understanding emotional fitness is not just about recognizing the feelings we experience but also about actively managing them. Many people find themselves in situations where they feel overwhelmed by their emotions, which can lead to stress and anxiety. By implementing practices that enhance emotional fitness, individuals can learn to navigate these challenges more effectively.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

511 SelfWork: Emotional Fitness and Being The Hero Of Your Own Life: Dr. Nick Wignall

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This week – in fact to be punctual about it – on August 5th, 2026 – <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxZg4SfIURg" rel="nofollow">the first episode of the new Ted Lasso season will be released.</a> Today, we&#39;re going to focus on the meaning of so many of Ted Lasso characters having secrets that they&#39;re keeping.... and the freedom they discover in the telling of them. Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

This week – in fact to be punctual about it – on August 5th, 2026 – the first episode of the new Ted Lasso season was released. Today, we&#39;re going to focus on the meaning of so many of Ted Lasso characters having secrets that they&#39;re keeping.... and the freedom they discover in the telling of them.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

510 SelfWork: Ted Lasso, The Pandemic and The Power of Secrets

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EMDR Therapy is known for its treatment of trauma. Dr. Laurel Parnell teaches and demonstrates how it can be healing for emptiness and grief - when relationships were never loving and for when they&#39;re gone.Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go. <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

EMDR Therapy is known for its treatment of trauma. Dr. Laurel Parnell teaches and demonstrates how it can be healing for emptiness and grief - when relationships were never loving and for when they&#39;re gone.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

509 SelfWork: EMDR Therapy: How It Can Help Fill Emptiness and Release Grief with Dr. Laurel Parnell

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Disillusionment is defined in psychology as a &#34;belief collapse.&#34; And the grief that that implosion can cause can be very hard to work through.Today&#39;s focus will be on how to do just that - get through disillusionment.<h2>What is disillusionment?</h2>Disillusionment happens when something you desire or believe strongly is true and right – something that you’ve worked hard to create or to build - crashes into a harsh reality.So many of my clients through the years have been disillusioned, demoralized people. They have reached a level of pain in their hearts and very souls that feels overwhelming.Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go. <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Disillusionment is defined in psychology as a &#34;belief collapse.&#34; And the grief that that implosion can cause can be very hard to work through.

Today&#39;s focus will be on how to do just that - get through disillusionment.

What is disillusionment?
Disillusionment happens when something you desire or believe strongly is true and right – something that you’ve worked hard to create or to build - crashes into a harsh reality.

So many of my clients through the years have been disillusioned, demoralized people. They have reached a level of pain in their hearts and very souls that feels overwhelming.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

508 SelfWork: The Eye-Opening Grief of Disillusionment and Heartbreak

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The subject for today is how to talk with a perfectionist about your concern for them. Or if you’re the perfectionist, how to allow someone into your world enough for you to hear that concern. I&#39;ll offer five definite approaches that work and you&#39;ll learn about the feedback loop that makes perfectionism addictive. Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go.<a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

The subject for today is how to talk with a perfectionist about your concern for them. Or if you’re the perfectionist, how to allow someone into your world enough for you to hear that concern. I&#39;ll offer five definite approaches that work and you&#39;ll learn about the feedback loop that makes perfectionism addictive.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

507 SelfWork: How to Effectively Talk To A Perfectionist

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/7/9/18/71832322-0c58-459c-92be-1b458b24af8f_appr1_dmr-506-patriciadixoninterview.mp3

Therapy harm is the topic this week, as Dr. Margaret welcomes her guest Dr. Patricia Dixon to SelfWork.<h2>What is therapy harm?</h2>We talk more openly than ever about the benefits of therapy, but less about the ways therapy can unintentionally cause harm. And harm does happen far too often with therapists who do things or say things that hurt their clients. Maybe it’s over-sharing, being dismissive of something their client is trying to describe, invalidating their experience. Or perhaps even worse, letting a client know of an attraction to them that they feel. <h2>Dr. Patricia Dixon, an expert in therapy harm and what&#39;s termed &#34;colorism&#34;</h2>Today <a href="https://www.amazon.com/African-American-Relationships-Marriages-Families-ebook/dp/B0GFP6FSSM/ref=sr_1_1?_encoding=UTF8&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.Db1HkAYfQBWgJQXx7-VYfQwok9NtlKgt2eaPMKE6Z72ES4sxrY3voTy3hGjgXeD0aNJeckw6rcyvLHOZH92kyA.K4KUYBOOGtuBSBCEcjvECNxxyoKKS8Ls5Ua87pgnMPA&dib_tag=se&keywords=B001IYXIEM&nsdOptOutParam=true&qid=1783621803&s=digital-text&shoppingPortalEnabled=true&sr=1-1" rel="nofollow">psychologist and mental health advocate Dr. Patricia Dixon</a> is shedding light on the often misunderstood concept of “therapy harm.” She explains what it is, how it can happen even with the best intentions, and why clients who experience it often struggle to speak up. We’re also going to focus on what’s called “colorism” - when fairer skin becomes an avenue toward privilege - and how she addresses that in her teaching and practice. Colorism happens in multiple cultures and is so important to legitimize as happening regularly.Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you make decisions about what to keep about your perfectionism and what to challenge. <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode.Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork!  Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Today psychologist and mental health advocate Dr. Patricia Dixon is shedding light on the often misunderstood concept of “therapy harm.” She explains what it is, how it can happen even with the best intentions, and why clients who experience it often struggle to speak up. We’re also going to focus on what’s called “colorism” - when fairer skin becomes an avenue toward privilege - and how she addresses that in her teaching and practice. Colorism happens in multiple cultures and is so important to legitimize as happening regularly.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

506 SelfWork: Therapy Harm: Straight Talk with Dr. Patricia Dixon

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/7/2/22/3e04a5a8-9ecb-4df9-aef1-87d992e856a8_appr1_dmr-505-depressiontxin2026.mp3

What&#39;s the most recent news for depression sufferers in 2026?That&#39;s the question Dr. Margaret researched today. Some new treatments are available now; some are still trying to get FDA approval. But there&#39;s a lot of promise out there, especially for what&#39;s termed treatment-resistant depression.There&#39;s also a new book out, Rethinking Suicide, that points out more recent research findings in suicide prevention. Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go. <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

What&#39;s the most recent news for depression sufferers in 2026?

That&#39;s the question Dr. Margaret researched today. Some new treatments are available now; some are still trying to get FDA approval. But there&#39;s a lot of promise out there, especially for what&#39;s termed treatment-resistant depression.

There&#39;s also a new book out, Rethinking Suicide, that points out more recent research findings in suicide prevention.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

505 SelfWork: What's The Most Recent News For Depression Sufferers in 2026?

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/6/25/19/6868423f-a6f6-463b-b8b8-9e24f57ae010_appr1_dmr-504-askdmr.mp3

Dr. Margaret will focus today on questions and answers that listeners have sent her by either voicemail or email.First topic for today: Is anorexia back &#34;in&#34; as beautiful? Second: Why could you be allowing your mom (with borderline traits) to occupy such emotional space in your life? And third: If I&#39;m openly sad when my son is getting ready to leave home, am I unintentionally setting him up to feel guilty? I so appreciate it when either listeners to the podcast or readers on my website comment to me, leave me a Speakpipe voicemail, or send in an email! So thank you to any and all of you who&#39;ve sent in questions and comments. Keep them coming!Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go. <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode.Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Dr. Margaret will focus today on questions and answers that listeners have sent her by either voicemail or email.

First topic for today: Is anorexia back &#34;in&#34; as beautiful? 

Second: Why could you be allowing your mom (with borderline traits) to occupy such emotional space in your life? 

And third: If I&#39;m openly sad when my son is getting ready to leave home, am I unintentionally setting him up to feel guilty?

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

504 SelfWork: Your Questions and Answers: Is Anorexia Back "In", Borderline Moms, and Mother/Son Enmeshment

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/6/18/19/5bf46e8c-c40c-4c3b-ab52-1404e4cca75e_appr1_dmr-503-courtneysmithinterview.mp3

Discover how to interpret the Enneagram in this episode of SelfWork! It&#39;s a personality test that&#39;s been around for decades. How is it different from other personality scales and what has made it so popular for so many years?Our expert speaker is <a href="https://sharkpartymedia-dot-yamm-track.appspot.com/2cL6qdPPkANr5w8xXj-3aykvWlQdyXObZt2txJr-yverpiV6_mQGsQTZqJtfe2TZkIB4dIi8a5iKjj16SKWoL6MUc1XeNsbGhziR6wtpupzAV3myltPgSEx_yl3aFZ3UJz1MD9eN3UlRbGEvCp2TnF---5nW-uvX9kJZ7WcMu6ZQ4gWzuSS3uVzUlZys" rel="nofollow">Courtney Smith</a>, who&#39;s a coach, group facilitator, and consultant who works with individuals and Fortune 500 companies to achieve change. She is a renowned practitioner of the Enneagram personality system, which she teaches alongside other personal development tools. She is the coauthor with Elise Loehnen of <a href="https://sharkpartymedia-dot-yamm-track.appspot.com/2Oy855idK6-kQwVBOrh9DRh9dshJyI1g7Qm1G5Dx1WarziV6_mQElvru77LTJgFiqCLnCdic0SUkb8-ICLROQmVBvzWwRihwKOaA4RxC19L75sO2wUdytxrD--i13V1Rgou0PoVx02v2fqYG4FMjVPTvAHHKyms9V14rWPDCVp4kPM2ILl3Zou7Kl0BbGGZwTc2GoZ07TGdOE2RgyjL2UGMxc26lmDh52oouAKTzqzYKlnyWJtPerbE6zCn0RhJFXq6hvTL_xDHMWbpg" rel="nofollow">Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness</a>. Courtney&#39;s newsletter is <a href="https://sharkpartymedia-dot-yamm-track.appspot.com/2Sf2Eb8tOIZAnhunIxnu6QM8Qgmd8ZU6VnI8Zb-45hZkAil6_mQF_PheRJkAN6wTu996VfMR3fkgU21IqI0roUFAAqrRL0bLjUA6AxU-2pqtteiZ3r7JK_otIfXrv_rbkbaCTKI_XJ-Lccyebsraq6qf_-5kNdkt2HMaKL5SxltuVddekIxX4Jgw06v7N5w" rel="nofollow">What We&#39;re Really Up To</a>.Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go.<a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode.Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Our expert speaker is Courtney Smith, who&#39;s a coach, group facilitator, and consultant who works with individuals and Fortune 500 companies to achieve change. She is a renowned practitioner of the Enneagram personality system, which she teaches alongside other personal development tools.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

503 SelfWork: Important Insights Into How to Interpret the Enneagram with Courtney Smith

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/6/11/21/8edf30ba-5570-4475-a1a0-39c261b619b0_appr1_dmr-502-amykurtzinterview.mp3

In this SelfWork episode, Dr. Margaret interviews an expert on medical and mental trauma of chronic illness - Amy Kurtz.<a href="https://tracking.us.nylas.com/l/585b6fcc28854f3cb24b94b2d94f745b/0/1af513cc9c2ccce068868caa182a1529963cf18797f172ee610e6c743f4a7126?cache_buster=1772138439" rel="nofollow">194 million Americans</a>–more than 76 percent of the population–are living with chronic illness. Many eventually stabilize, but what happens when the body heals and you still don’t feel safe inside it?Patient advocate and health coach <a href="https://tracking.us.nylas.com/l/585b6fcc28854f3cb24b94b2d94f745b/1/011c62ba86ac3be543a7e9b7ce2ed955adc869993bad0dfca542def71c8e6794?cache_buster=1772138439" rel="nofollow">Amy Kurtz</a> knows this gap in our healthcare system firsthand. Having gone to 36 doctors, she was already exhausted from that decades-long effort. Finally hearing the diagnosis of late-stage neurological Lyme disease with co-infections, and getting the right treatment, her labs may have improved. But as her body began to stabilize, the fear didn’t fade. She lived in constant anticipation that her health would collapse again at any moment. It was her husband who finally named what she couldn’t: the illness may have receded, but the trauma hadn’t.  What emerged from that conversation is her book that came out this week - <a href="https://tracking.us.nylas.com/l/585b6fcc28854f3cb24b94b2d94f745b/2/403edd24027dec90ee54bd7956f772101001f9a6ee9fb6acb55f30779ced1642?cache_buster=1772138439" rel="nofollow">BUT YOU LOOK FINE</a> (Balance, June 9), an earnest guide to get through the dark tunnel of what she calls Medical Trauma Brain: the lingering imprint of illness that doesn’t disappear just because the diagnosis improves.Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go.<a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork!<h2> </h2> Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

194 million Americans–more than 76 percent of the population–are living with chronic illness. Many eventually stabilize, but what happens when the body heals and you still don’t feel safe inside it?

Patient advocate and health coach Amy Kurtz knows this gap in our healthcare system firsthand. Having gone to 36 doctors, she was already exhausted from that decades-long effort. Finally hearing the diagnosis of late-stage neurological Lyme disease with co-infections, and getting the right treatment, her labs had improved. 

But as her body began to stabilize, the fear didn’t fade. . It was her husband who finally named what she couldn’t: the illness may have receded, but the trauma hadn’t. 

 What emerged from that conversation is her book that came out this week - BUT YOU LOOK FINE (Balance, June 9), an earnest guide to get through the dark tunnel of what she calls Medical Trauma Brain.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

502 SelfWork: The Medical and Mental Trauma of Chronic Invisible Illness with Amy Kurtz

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/6/9/23/6ae61e06-1dd1-4a9e-9b03-77fdfbf1e673_ht_take_pyschadelics_revised.mp3

This week we’re sharing a special episode from our friends at How To!, the 2026 Ambie Award-nominated “Best Personal Growth Podcast” that’s back with a new host and new topics to fuel your curiosity. Each week on How To!, award-winning journalist Mike Pesca tackles a listener’s question – on topics ranging from travel and finance to health and relationships – with help from world-class experts who actually know what they&#39;re talking about. Think of it as eavesdropping on someone else&#39;s therapy session, without the co-pay or awkward silence. And today, we’re sharing their recent episode “How To Take Psychedelics for Your Mental Health” where Mike interviews psychiatrist Dr. Will Van der Veer, a psychedelic researcher, and Myq Kaplan who has taken psychedelics for his mental health and other reasons. I love this episode because you get to hear a bunch of personal experiences of medical psychedelics and learn more about this emerging treatment for mental health conditions. And for more interviews like this, make sure to follow How To! on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. And tell them we sent you. Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Introducing How To!: “How To Take Psychedelics for Your Mental Health with Dr. Will Van Derveer”

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/6/4/19/e809652f-bddc-41ac-b5b7-6b024fa96e8e_appr1_dmr-501-culturalhumility.mp3

Dr. Margaret focuses today on the vital importance of what’s termed “cultural humility” as she responds to a listener voicemail, pointing out that as she’s a white person, her advice comes from a place of privilege in the US.Do you have to have walked in someone else’s shoes, carried the same load as they have, lived a life very similar to theirs – to truly understand them? Or to offer something helpful to them?I received a very open and honest voicemail this week that addresses this question. What follows is also a discussion of the difference between cultural competence and cultural humility. Order <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go.<a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Dr. Margaret focuses today on the vital importance of what’s termed “cultural humility” as she responds to a listener voicemail, pointing out that as she’s a white person, her advice comes from a place of privilege in the US.

Do you have to have walked in someone else’s shoes, carried the same load as they have, lived a life very similar to theirs – to truly understand them? Or to offer something helpful to them?

I received a very open and honest voicemail this week that addresses this question.

Certainly. with the United States as keenly and at times violently divided as our citizens are, it might be hard to find anyone who’d answer “yes” to that question. Yet, when I think about the people I’ve seen through the years as a therapist, I’d hope that at least many – if not most – of them have walked out of my office feeling as if something has been lifted from them. Or that they’ve gleaned some type of perspective that’s helpful. Sometimes, my experience or style is not a good fit for someone, and I refer that person to someone who might be better.

But I was very struck by this young woman’s comment and wanted to share with all of you. What follows is a discussion of the difference between cultural competence and cultural humility.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

501 SelfWork: Cultural Humility: What It Takes To Walk in Someone Else's Shoes

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/5/28/23/456886eb-8757-4604-998d-1c556d35ff59_appr1_dmr-500-paulgilmartininterview.mp3

It’s a little hard to describe Paul Gilmartin.He&#39;s worked as a stand-up comic. He makes furniture. And he&#39;s a <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/264-selfwork-enmeshment-maternal-sexual-abuse-having-feelings-for-your-therapist-your-questions-my-answers/" rel="nofollow">maternal abuse survivor</a>.To add to that, he was one of the first hosts of the TBS show <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dinner_and_a_Movie" rel="nofollow">Dinner and A Movie.</a> In fact, he hosted that show for years – and people still recognize him when he’s out and about!But his life has moved in many directions.Since 2011 however, he’s been the host of <a href="https://mentalpod.com/" rel="nofollow">the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast</a> – where he interviews all kinds of people – occasionally a mental health professional. And he encourages folks on the podcast to be as honest as they’re ready to be – about things that many have a struggle with revealing.I was honored to be on his podcast a few months ago. Paul’s demeanor is such that you find yourself talking to him like no one’s listening… which of course they will eventually be doing just that. He creates a safe space to do that within – and I found it quite a forgiving and emotionally supportive space. Something that makes his podcast unique is that he encourages his listeners to fill out anonymous surveys so he knows what exactly they’re going through – and no holes are barred as far as subject matter. And that’s where his conversations go – into territory that holds shame or fear for many.You can perhaps tell I’m a huge advocate for his work. Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

It’s a little hard to describe Paul Gilmartin.

He&#39;s worked as a stand-up comic. He makes furniture. And he&#39;s a maternal abuse survivor.

To add to that, he was one of the first hosts of the TBS show Dinner and A Movie. In fact, he hosted that show for years – and people still recognize him when he’s out and about!

But his life has moved in many directions.

Since 2011 however, he’s been the host of the Mental Illness Happy Hour podcast – where he interviews all kinds of people – occasionally a mental health professional. And he encourages folks on the podcast to be as honest as they’re ready to be – about things that many have a struggle with revealing.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

500 SelfWork: Paul Gilmartin On Healing from Maternal Sexual Abuse

https://s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/pod-public-media-files/2026/5/21/23/c09cdfa2-f605-464a-8bb2-7875ded3f66e_appr1_dmr-499-emotionalmartyrdom.mp3

Emotional martyrdom. What is it? And where does it come from? That&#39;s today&#39;s SelfWork episode.Recently, I got a comment on the <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/how-to-know-if-you-experience-perfectly-hidden-depression-a-questionnaire/" rel="nofollow">questionnaire</a> blogpost on perfectly hidden depression - from a woman whose every word convinced me that there are too many people in the world who believe it&#39;s their job to keep everyone around them happy.So today we&#39;re going to look at what&#39;s termed emotional martyrdom. This could be you or someone you&#39;re in a relationship with. It can sound like, &#34;It&#39;s my job to keep everyone happy, whether or not I am happy myself.&#34; Or, &#34;Don&#39;t worry about me, I&#39;m fine.&#34; Or, &#34;I&#39;m not hungry. Y&#39;all go on and eat what&#39;s there and I&#39;ll see what&#39;s left.&#34;Emotional martyrdom can be insidious, as it often masquerades as altruism but leads to neglecting one&#39;s own needs and happiness.The listener email involves a woman who was overly enmeshed with her own mom. She felt guilt for leaving in seeing other members of the family becoming enmeshed. But she also realized she might be repeating the same pattern, and asks the question, &#34;Should she overcompensate or work on things slowly?&#34; ORDER <a href="https://a.co/d/bdw6yuN" rel="nofollow">The Perfectly Hidden Depression Workbook</a> - A stand-alone workbook exploring the ten traits of Perfectly Hidden Depression, with guided exercises to help you decide what to keep from your drive and perfectionism, and what to let go.  <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Be a part of the conversation</a> and join Dr. Margaret’s newsletter for one weekly email featuring the latest blog post and podcast episode. Have a question or comment? <a href="https://drmargaretrutherford.com/" rel="nofollow">Send a voice message</a> for possible use on the podcast. By recording, you give permission for your voice to be used on SelfWork! Advertising Inquiries: <a href='https://redcircle.com/brands'>https://redcircle.com/brands</a>

Recently, I got a comment on the questionnaire blogpost on perfectly hidden depression - from a woman whose every word convinced me that there are too many people in the world who believe it&#39;s their job to keep everyone around them happy.

So today we&#39;re going to look at what&#39;s termed emotional martyrdom. This could be you or someone you&#39;re in a relationship with. It can sound like, &#34;It&#39;s my job to keep everyone happy, whether or not I am happy myself.&#34; Or, &#34;Don&#39;t worry about me, I&#39;m fine.&#34; Or, &#34;I&#39;m not hungry. Y&#39;all go on and eat what&#39;s there and I&#39;ll see what&#39;s left.&#34;

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

499 SelfWork: Emotional Martyrdom: It's Different Than Self-Sacrifice

I'm Dr. Margaret, a psychologist for over 30 years, TEDx speaker, and the author of Perfectly Hidden Depression. I created The SelfWork Podcast in 2016 to explain mental health treatment and to give you the chance to consider therapy without thinking it's weird or that it somehow suggests you can't fix your own problems. My team is very honored that nine years later, SelfWork has earned nearly 5 million downloads! Each episode features the popular listener question as well as interviews with outstanding guests, authors, and experts, adding to the wide diversity of topics listeners so appreciate. Regularly rated as one of the top mental health/depression podcasts out there (ranked as a top .5% internationally) I keep it short, casual, and focused on "what you can do about it." I'd love to hear from you. Please join me.