Baby, Your Eye’s Twitching, Your Table’s Burning, and Your Snake Just Took Your Thumb

We start with a man who saw his eye twitch and decided it was a bad omen. Now, most people would Google it, hydrate, maybe take a nap. Not this fool. No, he slapped himself in the eye until he lost sight. Baby, if your solution to a twitch is violence against your own face, you are the omen.

Then we move on to a young mom of two who walked into a restaurant wearing a tank top and declared it was “freezing.” And instead of asking for a different seat or putting on a cardigan like a person, she set a fire at her table. Because nothing warms the soul like felony arson over appetizers.

Next up: the Zoom coaster rider. Turns out — and we cannot stress this enough — your coworkers WILL notice if you’re on a roller coaster during a meeting. They will see the wind. They will hear the screaming. They will clock the loop‑de‑loop. And they will absolutely report you to HR.

And finally, we close with a Chinese man who decided to hand‑feed his pet snake. Hand. Feed. His. Snake. Baby, snakes don’t do gratitude. Snakes do bite, and this one took his thumb like it was a sampler platter.

It’s a full buffet of bad decisions, and we are here for it!!!!!

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy