- 100 Recovery Rules (with Mark Denison)
Addiction recovery is hard work. It is the process of learning to live in a whole new way apart from old, harmful, compulsive patterns. Such transformation doesn’t happen quickly or without help.
Our guest today is Mark Denison. He has been on the program several times before and is the co-founder, with his wife Beth, of There’s Still Hope. He joins us to talk about his newest book, Recovery Rules: 100 Truisms that Will Change Everything. Men often need pithy, wise tips to help them on the long road of recovery.
In our conversation, we highlight several of the truisms, such as:
- If you are 90% in, you are 100% out.
- Addiction isn’t a bad problem, it is a bad solution.
- If you can stay sober for 20 minutes, you can stay sober.
- Relapse is not an event, but a process.
- Don’t commit to a lifetime; commit to a day.
- Direction trumps destination.
If you are looking for some super practical help for your recovery journey, this episode will be very impactful.
To learn more about Mark and his ministry’s resources, visit TheresStillHope.org.
More Resources:
- Recovery Rules: 100 Truisms that Will Change Everything*
- Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
- Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups
Related Podcasts:
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations35m | Mar 27, 2024 - 8 Practical Steps of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a topic that gets brought up over and over again in the space of healing from betrayal. But before you tune out let me encourage you to stick around for my super practical conversation with Karla Downing on this topic.
Karla is the founder of Change My Relationship and has been on the podcast multiple times to help us think through important relational issues like boundaries and grief. Her many years of experience helping couples in very difficult situations comes out in this interview on forgiveness.
In the episode, Karla gives a robust definition of forgiveness and then walks us through eight practical steps that are essential to the process of forgiveness.
To learn more about Karla and her ministry, visit ChangeMyRelationship.com.
More Resources:
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations49m | Mar 20, 2024 - Why Building Confidence is Important to Recovery
Why is confidence important to recovery from addictive patterns? And how is confidence different from arrogance or pride?
To help us address this topic, we have Dr. Eddie Capparucci back on the program with us. Eddie is certified as a licensed professional counselor and certified in treating sexual and pornography addiction. He has been on the program multiple times to share his expertise and wisdom in the field of addiction recovery.
In our conversation, we discuss what confidence is, the causes and effects of a lack of confidence, what healthy confidence is rooted in, and how to grow in confidence. If you are a man who wants to grow and mature in your recovery, take notes and apply what Eddie shares in this episode.
To learn more about Eddie and his resources, visit InnerChild-SexAddiction.com.
More Resources:
- Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive
- Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction*
- Grace-Based Recovery Groups
Related Podcasts:
- Helping Men Navigate Between Logic and Emotion
- What To Do in the Moment of Temptation
- Why Men Struggle to Love
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations33m | Mar 13, 2024 - "Am I Gay?" (with Garry Ingraham)
There are many men and women in the Church who struggle with all forms of sexual brokenness, including same-sex sexual desires. How can Christians love and care for those who want freedom from such besetting sins?
In today’s episode, our guest is Garry Ingraham. Garry is the co-founder of Love and Truth Network, a ministry that equips church leaders in restoring biblical sexuality, community, and identity through personalized leadership training, teaching resources, and experiential growth opportunities for personal transformation and supporting others.
Garry shares his own story of same-sex brokenness and how God drew him out of the dark and into the light. He also shares how God called him into ministry, especially to pastors and helping them with their personal sexual struggles and how to address sexual sin and hope in the local church.
Finally, Garry has a new book entitled Am I Gay which highlights his story and how to navigate sexual confusion with the truth of Christ and the community of fellow Christians.
To learn more about Garry, his ministry, and the book, visit LoveandTruthNetwork.com.
More Resources:
Related Podcasts:
- Can the Church Be a Safe Place for Healing and Transformation?
- What To Do When Your Child "Comes Out"
- How Brokenness Fits with Wholeness in Christ
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations37m | Mar 6, 2024 - Living Undefiled (with Nick Stumbo)
Why is pornography such a big deal? This is a common question in the culture, but not necessarily one of alarm, but rather questioning why ministries like ours and many others even exist. Is there any real harm to pornography?
To help us answer these questions we have Nick Stumbo back on the program. Nick is the Executive Director of Pure Desire Ministries and an author and speaker on sexual issues from a Christian worldview.
In our conversation, Nick shares many of the negative effects of porn: biological, mental, emotional, and relational. We look at the many unhealthy patterns porn promotes, the natural trajectory of tolerance (both individually and culturally), the linkage between human trafficking and porn, and then how to live free from the negative effects of porn.
Finally, Nick shares a new video series resource called Living Undefiled that takes an in-depth look at the topics surrounding pornography and human trafficking.
To learn more about Nick and Pure Desire, visit PureDesire.org.
To get access to the Living Undefiled course, visit LivingUndefiled.com.
More Resources:
Related Podcasts:
- New Research on Why Women View Porn
- Exposing the True Impact of Porn
- Keeping Kids Safe in a Digital World
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations37m | Feb 28, 2024 - How Can I Lead Others When I Can't Lead Myself?
Register for Xposed Conference!
When: THIS Saturday, February 24th (join in person or online)
Xposed is an annual event to help pastors, ministry leaders, counselors, and individuals navigate sensitive sexual issues and equip them to care for their communities regarding God’s design for sex.
Register Online (use coupon code XP24-BBM for discount)
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Many men struggle deeply with their godly responsibilities of leadership, especially in the home, because they aren’t even managing themselves very well.
In this episode, Stephen brings a letter from a leader that is meant to be representative of most men who struggle with this internal conflict of leadership calling and poor self-management. This letter addresses issues like:
- Dividedness and hypocrisy
- Wearing masks to cover fear and shame
- Poor or non-existent emotional skills
- Weariness and hopelessness
For any man who can relate to what is shared in this letter, there is hope for transformation. You can become the man and leader God designed you to be.
For helpful resources to enhance your godly manhood and marriage skills, visit DoctorMarriage.org.
More Resources:
- Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive
- 49 Days of Growth by Stephen Cervantes*
- Daily Thoughts from Doctor Marriage
Related Podcasts:
- Helping Men Navigate Between Logic and Emotion
- A 7 Day Challenge for Emotional Growth
- Are You Open or Closed to Emotional Growth
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations29m | Feb 21, 2024 - Wisdom from a Sage in Recovery Ministry
Sometimes we don’t have a “topic” for the podcast, but instead simply have a conversation with someone with loads of experience and wisdom in sexual struggles and recovery. This is what today’s episode is all about.
Our guest is author and speaker, Nate Larkin. He founded the Samson Society, a fellowship of Christian men who are serious about authenticity, community, humility, and recovery.
In our conversation, Nate shares his own story of addiction and recovery. Then we dive into lots of questions that draw on his decades of personal and ministerial wisdom that will prove helpful to any man listening who wants to break free from unwanted sexual behaviors.
To learn more about Nate and his ministry, visit SamsonSociety.com.
More Resources:
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*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations35m | Feb 14, 2024 - Living More Than a Love Story
How important is trust to emotional health and building strong, mature relationships? It is vital! Yet, many men we have served in our ministry struggle terribly with trust.
In today’s episode, Stephen and I are going to dig into this important topic of trust through the lens of one man’s story that begins with him not being able to trust his parents with his thoughts and feelings and ends with him finally living a “love plus trust” story.
We will share the distinction between love and trust and how love plus trust takes us even deeper than love alone. We need to learn how to understand trust in its multilayered dimensions if we want to enjoy strong, healthy relationships.
For resources from Stephen to help you grow and mature emotionally, visit DoctorMarriage.org.
More Resources:
- 40 Days to Oneness
- Growth Map: The Pathway to Peace, Rest, and Joy*
- Untangling Emotions by Groves & Smith*
Related Podcasts:
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations31m | Feb 7, 2024 - Understanding Human Agency
Albert Bandura was a psychologist who is credited with developing the term “human agency,” which refers to how you act, think, and interact with life.
In this episode, Stephen and I will unpack the four functions of agency and how they might help us develop better self-awareness and deeper faith and relationships.
The 4 functions of agency are:
- Intentions (or intentionality)
- Outcomes (or expectations)
- Self-regulation
- Self-reflection
Agency asks, “Are you paying attention to your own intentions and are you getting better at self-regulating and self-reflecting?’ We hope this conversation will help you understand yourself and others better – and use your agency for good, godly purposes.
To learn more about Albert Bandura and his research, visit AlbertBandura.com.
More Resources:
- Untangling Emotions by Groves & Smith*
- Growth Map: The Pathway to Peace, Rest & Joy by Stephen Cervantes*
- APEST Spiritual Gifts Test
Related Podcasts:
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations29m | Jan 31, 2024 - Forgiving Forward (with Bruce and Toni Hebel)
Every Christian knows that forgiveness is central to salvation and restoration to God. But what does forgiveness look like between us and those who have hurt us?
Our guests today are Bruce and Toni Hebel, founders of Forgiving Forward, a ministry that helps people experience the freedom of the gospel through the power of forgiveness. They share their own journey of learning the hard way how vital forgiveness is to personal character and health, as well as effective ministry to others.
In our conversation, Bruce and Toni define forgiveness, explain why Christ is the only one who can pay the full debt of sin and wounds, expose the roots of unforgiveness, the common obstacles to forgiveness, and ultimately how to forgive in real-life situations of betrayal and pain through 5 key protocols:
- GRATITUDE for God’s forgiveness of me.
- REPENT of my sin of unforgiveness.
- WHO do I forgive and for WHAT?
- FORGIVE each offense from my HEART.
- Ask God to BLESS them and look for ways to bless them when possible.
To learn more about Bruce and Toni’s ministry and to get their book, visit ForgivingForward.com.
More Resources:
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*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations43m | Jan 24, 2024 - New Research on Why Women View Porn
Did you know that 58% of women who struggle with porn were exposed to porn before age 12? Or that 93% of women who struggle with porn never attend a support group? And that 48% of women viewing porn were a victim of sexual abuse?
Our guest today is Crystal Renaud Day, a coach, author, and speaker – and the founder and executive director of SheRecovery.com. She has been a leading voice for women in this space of sexual integrity ministry since 2009.
Recently, Crystal and her ministry conducted research to answer the question “What Drives Women to Porn?” There were over 1300 anonymous female participants, ages 18 to 65+ from 58 countries, who had used or been addicted to pornography in the past or present.
This episode discusses the findings of this research and why this is important to women struggling and those who love them.
To see the research and results, visit SheRecovery.com.
More Resources:
Related Podcasts:
- Total Freedom for Women Struggling with Porn
- God's Grace for Women Struggling with Porn and Sexual Shame
- Freedom and Healing from Shame, Addiction, and Abuse
*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations33m | Jan 17, 2024 - 4 Thoughts that Make Our Own Minds Feel Unsafe
Lots of men over the years have shared the sentiment of the following statement: “I’m good as long as I can stay out of my own head.” As we have unpacked this idea with the men who have shared this, there have been four key thoughts that typically keep guys from feeling safe within their own minds.
In today’s episode, Stephen and I are going to share these four thoughts. They are:
- Shame
- Old Stories
- Core Fear
- Unhealthy Fantasies
When you can understand how these thoughts operate and how to combat them, you can reclaim that territory in your mind for hope, peace, and joy.
For helpful "daily thoughts" on emotional health and growth, visit DoctorMarriage.org.
More Resources:
- Growth Map by Stephen Cervantes*
- Identity: What Foundation Are You Building On?*
- Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for Men
Related Podcasts:
- How to Be at Peace in Aloneness
- Overcoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity
- 50 Things To Do When Your Core Fear Gets Triggered
*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations29m | Jan 10, 2024 - Best of 2023: Back to the Basics of Sexual Integrity
Originally Aired on March 7, 2023
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Today’s episode is getting back to the basics of living a life of sexual integrity. Stephen Cervantes and I have been working with men desiring greater integrity for over 20 years, and we know that a life of integrity is not static. You must be on a daily growth mission to mature.
In our conversation, we share some of our personal growth tips and many other insights we have seen that help men get on a growth mission and discover their God-sized purpose in life.
A great next step in your pursuit of greater integrity is our Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive workshop. This Friday-Sunday event will help you get down to the roots of your unwanted sexual behaviors and provide practical, powerful direction for living each day with integrity and purpose.
Learn more about Gateway to Freedom and how to register at Bebroken.org/gtf.
More Resources:
Related Podcasts:
- Keys to Long-Term Freedom from Unwanted Behaviors
- 3 Levels of Sobriety
- Insights and Action Steps for Men
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations31m | Jan 3, 2024 - Best of 2023: Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal
Originally Aired on February 28, 2023
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HELP REACH THE YEAR-END GOAL TO IMPACT MORE LIVES!
We have a goal of $103,000 to reach even more individuals and families in 2024 through this podcast and all our other ministries.
To partner with us, give at Bebroken.org/donate or call 210-822-8201.
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Sexual betrayal in marriage is more common than most of us would like to admit. But this terrible fracture is not incurable for couples who choose to go on a journey of healing and restoration.
Our guest today is Dr. Michael Sytsma, a licensed professional counselor, ordained minister, professor, and founder of Building Intimate Marriages.
In our conversation, Michael answers questions about the “why” of affairs, the impact of past trauma, the myth of affairs only occurring in “bad” marriages, how to know if restoration is possible, what is required for restoration, and more.
To learn more about Michael and Building Intimate Marriages, visit IntimateMarriage.org.
More Resources:
Related Podcasts:
- Rebuilding a Healthy Marriage After Betrayal
- Affair Recovery Through a Trauma Lens
- Helping Husbands and Wives Go All In
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations37m | Dec 27, 2023 - A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional Growth
HELP REACH THE YEAR-END GOAL TO IMPACT MORE LIVES!
We have a goal of $103,000 to reach even more individuals and families in 2024 through this podcast and all our other ministries.
To partner with us, give at Bebroken.org/donate or call 210-822-8201.
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Just about every man who has ever entered recovery from unwanted sexual behaviors has wanted a “quick fix” to his addiction. But there are no quick fixes. In fact, true recovery is a years-long process that ultimately leads to deeper emotional growth over a lifetime.
In today’s episode, Stephen and I share a 3-year roadmap of recovery and emotional growth that every man who enters recovery needs to understand and embrace if he wants lasting freedom and lifelong joy. The road of recovery may be long, but it is worth walking it.
To get Stephen’s emotional growth resources for men, visit DoctorMarriage.org.
More Resources:
- Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
- Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups
- 40 Days of Purity Online Course
Related Podcasts:
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations32m | Dec 20, 2023 - Understanding Freedom, Identity, and Creativity in Addiction Recovery
HELP REACH THE YEAR-END GOAL TO IMPACT MORE LIVES!
We have a goal of $103,000 to reach even more individuals and families in 2024 through this podcast and all our other ministries.
To partner with us, give at Bebroken.org/donate or call 210-822-8201.
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Recovery from any addiction is difficult and there are many stages and layers to the process. It is easy to become overwhelmed and wonder if there is any hope and what the ultimate goal is in recovery.
My guest today is Zach Ellis. He is the Director of New Programs at The Nathan Project, a ministry whose mission is to engage, equip, and encourage Christian families struggling with pornography, sexual brokenness, and addiction.
Zach shares how he got into this space of ministry and some key elements of recovery that are vital for true transformation: freedom, identity, and creativity. He talks of freedom as both a “breaking” and a “building” and how this two-sided aspect of freedom leads to deeper meaning and purpose. He shares of the importance of identity and the value of listening. And, finally, Zach shares some insights around the need for exploring and expressing creativity as part of recovery.
To learn more about The Nathan Project, visit NathanProject.net.
To learn more about Zach and his photography, visit ZachEllisPhotography.com.
More Resources:
- Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive
- Grace-Based Recovery Online Study Groups
- 1-on-1 Personal Ministry Consultation
Related Podcasts:
- Men Helping Men Grow and Mature
- Keys to Long-Term Freedom From Unwanted Behaviors
- The Importance of Whole Man Recovery
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations39m | Dec 13, 2023 - A Youth Pastor's Conversation on Identity
HELP REACH THE YEAR-END GOAL TO IMPACT MORE LIVES!
We have a goal of $103,000 to reach even more individuals and families in 2024 through this podcast and all our other ministries.
To partner with us, give at Bebroken.org/donate or call 210-822-8201.
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Parenting can feel overwhelming in the best of circumstances. But in today’s world which is awash in all forms of sexual brokenness, it can seem impossible, especially when it comes to the issue of identity.
In today’s episode, our guest is Jordan Young. He is a student ministry pastor at Table Community Church in Hillsboro, Oregon near Portland. He has decades of experience in working with students and the various challenges they face in the culture.
Our conversation focuses on identity and the confusion many students are experiencing and how the gospel of Jesus addresses this with grace and truth. Jordan and their students read through our Identity book over 6 weeks and it made a huge impact on helping the students better understand what identity means and how we all live from a sense of identity, whether true or false – and why identity in Christ is the only source of eternal hope and peace.
You can get your copy of the Identity book by John Fort at Amazon* or our ministry resource page at Bebroken.org/store.
More Resources:
Related Podcasts:
- Exposing the Gender Lie (with Brandon Showalter)
- God Made Boys and Girls
- How Identity Shapes Everything
*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations31m | Dec 6, 2023 - The Journey to Stay (with Steve & Lisa Goldberg)
HELP REACH THE YEAR-END GOAL TO IMPACT MORE LIVES!
We have a goal of $103,000 to reach even more individuals and families in 2024 through this podcast and all our other ministries.
To partner with us, give at Bebroken.org/donate or call 210-822-8201.
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Infidelity is devastating. For couples who have experienced this deep betrayal of trust, it can be hard to imagine that restoration is possible – and even more difficult to think that they could rebuild their marriage into something better than they ever had before. But this is the story of Steve and Lisa Goldberg’s marriage and ministry.
Steve and Lisa are the founders of Side by Side, a ministry to help couples navigate the “unexpected crash” of betrayal and how to restore and rebuild their marriage.
In today’s episode, Steve and Lisa share their own story of brokenness and healing and the key elements of restoration in their new book entitled The Journey to Stay. They offer a practical message of hope to couples facing the overwhelming difficulty of unfaithfulness.
To learn more about Steve and Lisa and their ministry, visit StaySidebySide.org.
More Resources:
- The Journey to Stay
- The Journey to Stay Guide (free download)
- Building True Intimacy* by Drake & Raabsmith
Related Podcasts:
- Navigating the Revelation of an Affair (Steve & Lisa)
- Conflict Management for Marriages Healing from Betrayal
- Helping Couples Walk the Path of Restoration After Sexual Betrayal
*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations36m | Nov 29, 2023 - Going Deeper for Women: How Your Inner Child Impacts Your Love and Sex Addiction
HELP REACH THE YEAR-END GOAL TO IMPACT MORE LIVES!
We have a goal of $103,000 to reach even more individuals and families in 2024 through this podcast and all our other ministries.
To partner with us, give at Bebroken.org/donate or call 210-822-8201.
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Everyone listening to this podcast right now was once a child. Childhood is unavoidable on the journey to adulthood. But none of us got through our childhoods unscathed. And some of the residue of that continues to affect us now as adults.
Today we have back with us Dr. Eddie Capparucci to talk about his inner child therapy model and a new resource he has co-authored for women who struggle with love and sex addiction. Eddie’s model is based on the premise that we all have core emotional triggers that impact our inner child based on past wounds, and in order for us to heal and mature we must address these triggers by understanding our inner child and not simply ignoring our past.
In our conversation, Eddie defines the inner child model and highlights the 10 specific “inner children” for women to understand in order to heal and recover from love and sex addiction.
To learn more about Eddie and the inner child model, visit AbundantLifeCounselingGA.com.
More Resources:
- The Inner Child Recovery Process
- SheRecovery.com*
- 90 Days to Wholeness*
- The Myth of Normal* by Gabor Mate
Related Podcasts:
- God's Grace for Women Struggling with Porn and Sexual Shame
- The Immanuel Approach in Recovery
- Total Freedom for Women Struggling with Porn
*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations38m | Nov 22, 2023 - Better Screen Time for You and Your Family
Screens are everywhere and, while they are not bad or wrong as a tool, the way we engage them and what we allow on them can be negative. So, how can we build better screen time for ourselves and our families?
Our guest today is Andrea Davis, the founder and CEO of Better Screen Time, which provides strategies and resources for families to think through how to engage technology and screens for better health and balance in life and relationships.
Andrea shares her own story as a parent of 5 kids and some of the challenges and victories they have experienced in working out these strategies in their family. She also shares why cell phone contracts rarely work and better strategies for creating a family tech plan to learn personal responsibility with technology.
To learn more about Andrea and the resources she provides, visit BetterScreenTime.com.
More Resources:
Related Podcasts:
- Brain Defense Digital Safety for Kids
- Helping Parents Teach Healthy Tech to Kids
- Keeping Kids Safe in a Digital World
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Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations34m | Nov 15, 2023