SHOW / EPISODE

S4E4 - Lust: A Disordered Search for Intimacy

1h 6m | Sep 29, 2026

As we continue our series on the seven deadly sins, we pivot to the more outward, consumptive sins: lust, greed, and gluttony, specifically focusing on lust in this episode. Pornography often comes to mind first, but it's only one of many ways lust can show up in our lives. Since most of us have heard plenty about what not to do, we start with a better question: what is sex actually for?


Sex was God's idea from the beginning. It points to our deeper longing for union with God, unites us with our spouse, and brings forth new life. Lust isn't the desire for sex within marriage. It's a disordered search for intimacy that promises connection but trains us to avoid it, keeping us in a loop fueled by excuses like "you're stressed" or "you're lonely." Desire isn't the enemy, but it becomes destructive when it stops asking, "How can I love?" As Augustine said, our hearts are restless until they rest in God, and lust promises to fill that restlessness but never delivers. In the end, lust isn't wanting too much of God's design. It's wanting far too little of it.


Brook gets personal about what lust takes from fathers, sharing how it affected his family of origin and how pornography became a temptation during an overwhelming season of life. We talk about asking, "What's the thing behind the thing?" and why taking our sin seriously helps us take God's grace seriously.


Practically, here's where we landed:

  1. You'll be most protected from lust when you're running to God and to your marriage for intimacy.
  2. Stay in open, ongoing conversation about lust with covenant friends.
  3. Your wife should know the passcodes to your phone, and you should never be alone with it.
  4. Don't let your kids be alone on the internet.


Podcast Episodes Mentioned: Sex in Marriage: Communication, Connection + Healing Past Wounds Around Intimacy (YouTube, Spotify + Apple Podcasts) + The Hidden Blockers of Sexual Desire in Marriage + How to Move Past Them Together (YouTube, Spotify + Apple Podcasts) + Brook’s Interview on the Open Spaces Podcast (YouTube, Spotify + Apple Podcasts)


Protect Young Eyes: Website, Instagram + Facebook


Intentional Fatherhood Retreat: November 12-14, 2026 in Austin, TX


Scripture Mentioned: Genesis 1, Genesis 2:24, Genesis 4:7, Matthew 5:27–28, Matthew 19:6, Ephesians 5, James 1:14–15, 1 Corinthians 10:12, Joshua 24:15


Sowing a Hidden Seed: Marriage Edition is currently available as our thank you gift to Legacy Builders, Intentional’s monthly giving community. Learn more at intentionalparents.org/devotional.


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