How to (Not) Get Divorced: The Relationship-Killer Cycle (and how to get out of it)

In this episode, we'll delve deep-down into the cycle that often leads to divorce: happiness -> tension -> complaining -> criticism -> contempt -> defensiveness -> stonewalling (via flooding) -> isolation -> loneliness -> separation. We'll learn about healthy complaining vs unhealthy criticism, why it is necessary to complain sometimes, and gender differences. Men and women cannot expect to have similar interactions with their partners as they do with their friends. As we will see, they have very different physiological responses to emotion and complaints. Both need to be very conscious of how what they are doing is affecting their partner for they often DO NOT see it the way we intend them to. Catch yourself in this cycle early to prevent it from proceeding to the end, and do the opposite of it to bring you back to good times. It doesn't have to always be perfect, just aim for 5 good times for every bad.

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